In the night,
Ghostly shadows tower over the living,
Shutting out the light
Like shades pulled down over the sun
A light bulb slowly dying
Huge hands flick off the switch
Ghostly shadows tower over the living,
Shutting out the light
Like shades pulled down over the sun
A light bulb slowly dying
Huge hands flick off the switch
Watching for the hint of pale blue,
The time for them to fade,
Hang above this spinning top
A million shining lights,
Pinpointing their place among the sheer blackness
Crickets chirp out the rhythm of the night,
Joined by the noises of darkness,
As the giants of the woods
Wait for the glint
Of the emeralds strung off their arms
And as night's hands reach to cover the lights of towns and cities,
The sleek and cool blanket of nature
Soothes those who are of the dark
As they reveal themselves
Only to be once again hidden by what happens
In the night
Whoa! okay, this is a little depressing and dark but I totally see what your saying. You describe the night in creepy and weird ways but I don't know, there's something I really like about it! Really good metaphors! Good job!
ReplyDeleteNice job with syntactic and symanttic devices in this poem. The repitition of "In the night" at the beginning and end of the poem was pretty cool. I like how you stray off of the topic ever so slightly to bend the reader's imagination. Great metaphors like "Giants of the woods" and "The hand of darkness". Great poem.
ReplyDeleteGood poem. It flows together nicely.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful poem! I love the wording, as well as the visual layout. The effect is a really well crafted piece. Excellent.
ReplyDeleteYeah this was really great in so many ways. The whole poem flowed together really gracefully and poeticly (I'm not even sure if that is a word!). Nice job :)
ReplyDeleteI agree with everybody it was a really good poem and you get a great picture. Oh, by the way, I like the Ub stuff.
ReplyDeleteoh my goodness! you have the best similies and hyberboles or watever and u have a very good voice! im so jealous!
ReplyDeleteIt's so pretty! I love your voice that you use in your poems, it's really calm and peaceful.
ReplyDeleteGreat! I love it! It paints a picture. It also has so many different feelings to it. At first I thought it was going to end in a really tragic place, but it turned around by the end into a peaceful and serene place.
ReplyDeleteAs everyone has said before me great poem. The voice stands out very strongly.
ReplyDeleteThis is kind of like a poem I read once, except better. There are some really great similes and metaphors and stuff. I can never really tell which is which. But this is a REALLY good poem.
ReplyDeleteYou have a very good voice and it's a great poem!
ReplyDeleteI love this poem becasue it flows and is a different way to interpret darkness. The picture was also a nice touch.
ReplyDelete